She remarked that, like me, a lot of her friends do it for her, (thanks Ashley M!) but she doesn’t have a problem about calling herself a writer, because that’s what she does.

“Plumbers don’t have a problem calling themselves plumbers do they? Writing is what I do.”

I’m learning that if I don’t start introducing myself as a writer, then it gives the appearance that I’m ashamed or embarrassed about what I do. And that’s far from it. I enjoy writing immensely. And if I enjoy it, why not talk about it? Why not tell others? I have to get out of my head that I come across arrogant when announcing that I write. “Take my card dahling, I’m an author…”

It’s not arrogant when asked what I do for a living to say that I’m a writer, or even better, an author. Because I am. Yes, I do stay home with my daughter too. But that’s not what my business card says.

Is there something else on?

Isn’t there something else more news-worthy they could be reporting about?

If I hear one more thing about this wedding, I’m going to poke my eyeballs out.

You get my drift, people were a bit tired of it. Which got me thinking about us writers. When we have a new book out—or even when we’re in the middle of writing our next book—it seems all we can focus on is our book. We take to our Twitter and Facebook and constantly chime about our book signings and readings, or constantly provide links instructing our readers how to purchase their copy. And that’s all fine—as writers we are supposed to promote our work. But sometimes if we talk about it a wee too much we will turn into the little girl in the photo below. (Yes I know her name—Grace Van Cutsem, Prince William’s goddaughter. But little girl sounds so much easier…)

She’s covering her ears from the noise—“Enough already!”—she wants to shout.

That my friends, are our readers or colleagues when we barrage Twitter and Facebook with our book news. Sure, our readers want to hear when our book is coming out, or if we’ll be in their city soon—but not every five minutes. If you keep it up you will have too many people pressing the Unfollow button or removing you as a Friend.

As with everything, balance is key. The golden rule applies to just about everything in life, and it applies here too. If your best friend only talked about socks, (I could have used just about any word here, but socks popped up in my mind first so I’m using that as my example. Yes, my mind is weird…) how she picks her socks, how she was invited to speak at a sock convention, how she makes her own socks and keeps asking you to buy a pair…I don’t think you guys would be friends for long, would you? Become more well-rounded when you Tweet. Yes we know you’re a writer—it says so on your bio. But chances are, if I’m following you I’ve already read your books. I want to get to know you a little bit better. People who follow me know that I love Dancing with the Stars, and I love anything and everything hair-related. See? Nothing too personal, but they still see a side of me that you wouldn’t know if you just read my books. So use your book news like salt. A few sprinkles enhances the whole meal, but too much can ruin everything.

I’m so used to screaming from the rooftops, (or having my hair scream for me) “Hey, I do hair!” Now, I’m going around whispering, “Hey, do you like to read?” I’ve had to re-train my mind and work out different marketing strategies, seeing what’s worked (and what hasn’t) for me in the past, and seeing what works for other authors I admire.

Word-of-mouth is one of the targets that all authors are looking for. As a hairstylist, your hair is a symbol of how well you do hair. Get a few business cards printed, pass them out—and you’re on your way. If your work is good, then here come the referrals. With writing, it’s hard to figure out what generates word-of-mouth. I live in Houston, and for me, being a great hairstylist in Houston was enough. But as a writer, the word-of-mouth has to travel, across states–and for the fortunate ones–across countries.

And then there’s the budget. Most authors use most of their advance promoting their books. (Which is sort of like working at an office and having to provide your own pens, paper, computer…Not fair of course, but then what is?) Last go around with Six O’clock I spent ALL of my advance, (and then some) and I’m sorry to say that I didn’t see much results. If $5,000 gets you zero results, then what does, um, say $500 get you? Don’t get me wrong, I know I’m a newbie and have to develop my readers, but in what business model does the creative department also have control of the marketing department?

I guess what I have to say is, I love to write. I loved doing hair too, and the way to market myself and get more clients was to do what I loved—hair. It all went hand in hand. Now, I spend a year or more writing a book, and to market it I don’t use my writing talent, I use marketing skills that are sorely underdeveloped. I’m doing a few things differently with Unbeweavable, but only time will tell if it works out. Did I mention that you can pre-order now?

Source: Photobucket.com

My daughter is addicted Wall-E. She can watch the thing about three times a day. Fortunately for me, I actually like this movie. There’s a part in the movie when a woman loses her computer signal, (which is directly in front of her face as she floats around in her hover-chair), and she notices for the first time that the ship has a swimming pool. She never noticed it before because she was always connected to the computer.

 Have you ever felt like that? That you spend so much time connected electronically to everything that you don’t feel like you are spending quality time with people the old-fashioned way, face-to-face?

So I ask you, with all the promotion that we have to do as writers and all the different social media outlets out there, how much is too much?

I had no problem giving one of my business cards to a stranger, tossing my glorious, long weave over my shoulder, and proudly telling them if they wanted their hair to look as good as mine, then they needed to come see me. Because of my confidence, most of the women would come, and stay with me for years. But when it comes to talking about my novel, I get tongue-tied, and I can’t get any words out.  Basically I turn into a blubbering idiot. Even when the opportunity presents itself to me, I feel embarrassed to promote my work. I feel like I’m bragging, like I’m saying, “Hey world, come look at how brilliant I am! I wrote a book!”

My family insists otherwise, and they keep telling me that it’s the same thing. Promoting myself as a stylist is the same thing as promoting my book. With hair, you are your product.  You have to keep your hair done at all times so that other women can become potential clients.  With promoting my books I need to learn that if I’m scared to talk about my new book, then who will?  Who will ever know about my characters, or the journey they take to self-discovery in my novels if  I don’t tell them?

I really have to stop being such a scaredy-cat and put myself out there this time around. Some things I still won’t compromise on, (Twitter for one), but there are plenty of other avenues where I can tell people about my books. I just need to trust myself and get out there and do it. 

Anybody else had a hard time talking about their novel?